I agree with Pam, it sounds like you kept a cool head and spoke the truth as you know it when you had your talk. One thing that I am going to try with my H is to say "help me understand" when I don't get what he is saying. I hope to try it soon. Maybe it will get him to say more about his perspective and give me a chance to process his reason - and keep my mouth shut while he is explaining his reason. Maybe that would help next time the OW still working with H topic comes up. JMHO - I can't relate to the OW stuff all the time as I luckily don't have that in my sitch.
I can relate, however, to your H keeping something inside and then having it come out 5 years later. Much of what is going on in my sitch seems to have been festering for quite some time, unbeknownst to me of course!
Hey Opt and Pam and anyone else - there is a new thread on Newcomers about going dark when you've been there for years (by ms-Lucy) - sorry I forgot to link it here. Anyway, check it out - it really got me riled up as you will tell from my posts there.
Opt - you are great and give me hope. I appreciate your checking up on me - I hope to have more baby steps to report this week as my D8 starts hockey tomorrow night and I will get to be around H for a bit, not just pick up and drop off of kids. Cross your fingers for me.
Oh and hey - I agree with everyone about doing activities together that can keep your mind off everything so as you face the upcoming weekend - got any walls to demolish? Or paint? Or any other projects? And FYI - our house is only 12 years old, but my H always wanted that wall gone, and had convinced me likewise - and he hadn't done it, so I did it for me (and him if he comes back !)
How did your D do with her skating by the way?
Night!
totite
"Accentuate the positive, eliminate the negative..."
!)
