She is living in town with a female coworker and her daughter from the little I know. She has told me time and again that there is no one else involved. I have asked her if it was a man or a woman. She swears that she is not under the influence of a man, woman or friend.
Do you have a lawyer?
No. I talked to one back in April but I was still messed up. He ended up telling me to set up a MC session and let wife in on date and time. That never happened.
How are bills split now? It's not as cut and dry 50/50 like your wife thinks.
I have paid all the bill for 17 years. She has been working part time for two years. She handled all household chores and bill payment. I do know that prior to March she did contribute some of her money to help out, but pull all her earnings off the table.
Why are you leaving the house on alternate weekends and letting your wife tell you to leave?
I thought I would allow her to come back to the house and be with the kids in an attempt to see what she has been missing seeing if she would soften to the idea of being around more. She has stayed here maybe 6 or 7 times since the seperation.Each time has been for one night only, in which I went out with friends. I only stay away on one of those night.
I'm going away with D 6 the first part of August for 3 days and have asked her to stay with my older kid who have to remain behind due to school activities.
I don’t know who I‘am , I’ve taken care of everybody for so long.
Do you understand what she is telling you?
She is saying that three months after we were married she started taking care of our family (our son was born). She has taken care of 3 kids and myself since 1992. Also her mother has been very dependent on her for the last several years. I did not help her out much when my business was booming. But I was there for her and the children for all family activities and financially. Maybe not as emotionally as I could of been. But she is a very private person that does not reveal much or complain, never any fighting or confrontation, a little jealousy perhaps. She took care of evey aspect of our personal lives. Over the last few month she seemed to be less attentive to the way she kept the house. I just chaulked it up to her working and running the kid and her mom around.
How does your wife feel cared for?
I always felt that as long as I earned a great living and provide security and shelter for our family she seemed so happy. But over the last year our earnigs have decreased and we have had to cut back to meet our obligations, also the irs levy on her pay check did not go over to well. I have kind of a hard time putting icing on the cake when explaining things to her, it come out very blunt and matter of fact. Example she swipes a atm card at the coffee shop and we get a $35 charge to cover nsf, my reply how was that $40 cup of coffee.
What do your phone bills tell you now?
It made me so angry to look at them, that I have not looked since May. I did call the OM back in April and ask as to why he was calling my wife. His reply was that he had walk away from his family and messed up his life. That she seemed lonely and he was trying to talk her out of making the same mistake. I asked how they met, he did not directly say but I believe it was the internet. He claimed she presented herself as seperated. He lives about 50 minutes from us. I have brought this up to my wife back in May, but she say's I need to drop it. So I have.
M (46) W (45) S (17) D (14) D (6) T (20) M (17) Seperated 3/2009 . When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze." Isaiah 43:2
