Thanks, T2. I am not sure that I understand what you mean by my 'abrupt tone' but to me it just means that I am furious. And it is a very cold, very calculating fury. I have come to a point in which he either shapes up or moves out, and this time for good. I have reached my limit.
I still want my M to work and our R to be repaired, but I am not going to take meekly the situation. I have given him ample time to get rid of her and he has not done so. So, I am going to start my own campaign: if it works, fine, if it does not work, there is the door. If he does not like it, he can do it himself or he can leave. Actually, he touched the subject of D in our talk the other day (I had asked him -stupid me- if he thought we had a chance and he said that he thought we did, that is why he was making plans for the house and stuff but that if it didn't I already knew where he stood in the subject of D).
As to the money, my H has promised that he'll take me to talk to the bussiness CPA, 'when he comes back' and I have had the books of his practice since the bomb, when I filed for D (my H gave them to me). But the CPA is a friend of OW's and (she tells me) she had told him that my H was getting divorced from me and marrying her. They go to the same church or something.
She had him change to this CPA when the old one (the one that does my taxes) noticed that she was making charges to the office account that were not bussiness related. He sent my H a letter about it and next thing he knew he received a fax firing him. My H told me then that he had changed because the first CPA was 'too expensive'. But I plan to call his office tomorrow and make an appointment to see him.
So, yes, the reason I go so often to his office is that I want to leave my mark clearly on it. Actually I just hung up from telling his OW, 'not to bother him, but just tell him to bring some milk and ham when he comes home tonight', on your advice
My H once accused me of blowing up in fury and not caring about the consequences. And he is right. I have a terrible temper that I usually keep under very, very tight rein. But there are drops that break the camel's back!
So I am not going to make a scene, cry, rave or rant. But I am going to start to make my mark in his office and his life. If it makes him feel bad, tough luck. If it pushes him away, it was meant to be. I have waited enough! I am not going to settle for second best. I am better alone than in bad company.
The other thing I want to do is to start managing the finances of the office myself. I am going to tell my H (if we are still on speaking terms after today) that I understand his need to prove some things to himself, but that I need to keep some control over the situation. That I want her signature removed from the office bank account and I will sign her (and her DD's) paychecks. And she will be charged for the lease on the car (since she is no longer rendering the 'services' she was being compensated for, she is not going to be paid for them). Talk about whores... here is the entry on the term in the Merriam-Webster dictionary
Quote: Main Entry: whore Pronunciation: 'hOr, 'hor, 'hur Function: noun Etymology: Middle English hore, from Old English hOre; akin to Old Norse hOra whore, hOrr adulterer, Latin carus dear -- more at CHARITY Date: before 12th century 1 : a woman who engages in sexual acts for money : PROSTITUTE; also : a promiscuous or immoral woman 2 : a male who engages in sexual acts for money 3 : a venal or unscrupulous person
Sounds very bad PMA?
"You don't throw a whole life away just 'cause it's banged up a little"
Tom Smith in "Seabiscuit"
And it is a very cold, very calculating fury. I have come to a point in which he either shapes up or moves out, and this time for good. I have reached my limit.
