K4D Rising #3

[25yearsmlc]

I just want to know if the whole STANDING = "Waiting for w to return no matter what" means what I fear it means for you...

No GAL, no true living, no sustained 180s, & only focusing on girls to pass the time, and hope they somehow help you in your R with your wife, or can be manipulated in conversations about HER or going to church, or what she is doing, or the legal status of the div, or your R talks with them about her....

There was a time you said you knew you could be happy with or without her. That was the healthiest post you have written, by far. THAT POST --SHOWED FAITH IN IT.

Then I posted about not backsliding and holding on to this progress, and you agreed. But To me, what you just said, pretty much is a major backslide to where you were months ago. IT is ALL about getting her back and nothing else will do. How sad. After all this time, do you still not get it? DBing is not about getting your spouse back no matter what....it's so much more...that's why "success rates of recon" are only part of the story. The REAL story is how happy the people are who have been here and taken charge of their own lives and happiness. They find in all their situations, that they are more attractive to others, as they GAL and become who they were meant to become. That increases, but does not guarantee the chance of a recon. Free will on the part of the WAS still exists and always will.

How demanding of God to tell him what you want/expect and refuse to do without. God won't make her come back. He gave her free will, remember? Standing isn't about saying "she comes back or else"....You can call your standing a form of faith, some will call it stubborn denial...I just call it sad. And like you have amnesia...so much beauty and love all around that you will not see if you focus ONLY on her and returning to you, as you are.
How can the same guy who posted last week about detaching, post this? Maybe detaching got too frightening...I don't know.
j-