I'm sorry to hear court didn't go well for you. Sometimes it goes kind of crazy. Was this a temporary child support/alimony order or the final? If temporary I think you can work to change that in the future. I know my H is. smile When we had the first hearing honestly the judge didn't even look at our financials. My L asked for $1600 alimony monthly (what I was paying for bills) and H's L asked for $800 so the judge split it and did $1200 a month. My L said he always splits the 2 so I guess it's an easy thing for him to figure out? But seems kind of crazy to me. I think things could def. change at final hearing, and in your case as well.

I also think you could work on economizing. I've lowered my previous standard of living several times now. Don't eat out, don't vacation, nothing really but the bills. I do all free stuff for the kids pretty much or stuff that costs $1 or $2. You could look for a 2nd job or a higher-paying job although I think that might be something you might have to wait on for a year or so b/c it's harder to get a job right now.

I don't think you should waste your breath defending your religious views or your views on marriage to anyone. That's just wasted energy. I personally have respect for those that do so, and I don't feel like you have anything to defend.

Your wife painted you out to be a bad guy. They pretty much all do that. They either view you as a bad guy or they have to look at themselves. They don't want to do that, so there it is. Be the best guy you can be and everyone will know the truth.

You DB for yourself. I still DB my butt off, but now for me and my kids. I've also found that if you DB and GAL and work on yourself, things get better every day. Karen

Me 53
D18, S24