Living, Loving, & Learning one day at a time

[Treese]

Snodderly....I have been writing down questions....geez...there's so much..

Got into a fight with H tonight....I'm not DBing well but I have been doing good...

H says he's trying to take care of me....that he wants to sit down and discuss it all...we can get through the tough stuff and then go to the mediator...I told him no....I told him he made all our choices, that all he cares about is himself and his new little life....he said if I cared about the kids I wouldnt waste money on an attorney....and on and on....I was crying...couldn't help it...he shows no emotion....

He said I act like Im going to get a bunch of money....we don't have any money....that I'll only get half because his attorney told him he has to be able to live also....I told him to quit trying to erase me from his life, and erase history....he said he's not...and it is what it is....

I think if he was right in front of me I would have slapped him....He also threw in my face that I will get nothing for my D22 and probably not D17 cause it will be that long to hash this out....I said, "wow, you're proud of that"....

I said, I guess you need to sell the motorcycle cause its a luxury and he said fine...when its all done he'll buy another one cause he needs a new one anyway....he said he doesnt care about money...he just wants to move on with his life and with OW....that hurt....

will I ever let go of him....you mean he doesnt think about me at all....all these years and nothing....


OH....then he told me he was going out of town this weekend..motorcycle thing....I said, must be nice...2nd vacation for him this year and I have gotten nothing....he said, see....why can't you just say fine.....wow....

So, I'm not fighting for him anymore...he has his mind made up and I told him I will not sign the final paper as I didn't agree with what he is doing.....he didn't care as long as he gets out of our marriage....

So, see....I screwed up again.....I just want to scream....he has been with OW for a long time....they will most likely get married.....


On with the 2 x 4's