BobbiJo, I have a lot of trouble imagining a 35 year old guy who clearly had very good taste in women deciding that he never wants to be in a relationship again! I think it is a lot more likely that he doesn't like himself very much right now, and saying things like that protects him from having to think about what he is really doing.
I wouldnt be surprised if he has been seeing the OW on and off.
I think the more likely thing would be random hookups (maybe in hookers) in some of the places he travels. As I read here before, the talk amongst guys in his business is pretty degrading about women. I am sure the temptation is there and I would not be one bit surprised that him and some of the other meat traders dont partake in it.
Yes, Kerry, I noticed in the convo. that he said he never wanted a RELATIONSHIP with any woman. But random strippers/one night stands on the road for work are not relationships, are they?
I just told him that it was too bad he felt that way and I hoped he got himself straightened out for Nathan's sake because he IS the model for Nathan of how to view women...
I found H's most recent remarks ie. not being in any way capable of being in a R and having entirely skewed demeaning view of women to be very very lucid remarks on his part. First time that it has happened, where he has self analyzed and come up with something very meaningful an on point, in ......... ..well I don't really know ..you would be the far better judge there ..I am just a 'fly on the wall' ...but I could venture a guess.
I found H's most recent remarks ie. not being in any way capable of being in a R and having entirely skewed demeaning view of women to be very very lucid remarks on his part. First time that it has happened, where he has self analyzed and come up with something very meaningful an on point, in ......... ..well I don't really know ..you would be the far better judge there ..I am just a 'fly on the wall' ...but I could venture a guess.
His remarks were very interesting to me.
I will pray for continued clarity for him.
T
Thanks, T. The optimist in me hopes that he will use this realization to pray for clarity and guidance...the defense mechanism in me says to get used to him not being here...
I so appreciate the prayers.
Unfortunately, I scrapped all my plans for tonight. As soon as he left with the kids I was overcome by a migraine. Granted I went cold turkey on pop today (Jeff remembers that, right??) so it could be related. Blinding headache and keep throwing up so I am going to bed....
Wow! I hope you feel better soon! I'm glad I didn't have that much of a reaction. Did have some headaches, though. It gets easier! And boy, am I proud of it!
it seems the optimist part of you as well as the defensive part go hand in hand and work simultaneously.
he needs to not be there w/ U. being by himself i belive is perhaps the only way that more of those types of realizations will occur. and once enuf of them do occur then the next step of taking action on those realizations.
I like what he had to say and what it very well could mean.
I will throw off the rose colored lenses now and don the amber ones and see if I like the way it looks just the same. lol
I am ok. Sydney is sick...102 fever and she hasn't eaten anything, refuses to eat...has only drank about 2 oz since she got up this morning and hasn't peed since 5 a.m. Worried she is getting dehydrated! I offered anything under the sun to eat/drink and she says, "No I don't want ANYthing!", except to sleep...
Otherwise I am sort of caught between approaches at the moment. I was going great guns on 'tough love' and 'enforcing boundaries' and then someone on here posted a link to rejoice ministries. They talk about unconditional love vs. tough love. I agree with parts of BOTH approaches, but it has my head spinning a little.
