Magnificent

[StrgMarvelousWmn]

sheesh like you should have to ask. He is such a jerk.

Living God's blessings with grace and dignity~
SMW

[mishka422]

Ok, just checking!

I feel like such a schmuck though. Why oh why is it bothering me so much that he did that? Stupid! It shouldn't effect me one way or the other at this point, should it?

[Kalni]

jerk!!! (not you mish, in case you need clarification)

brakes: I was thinking, why dont you make him do things for you since he is not paying CS anyway? Just be away when he does them. Make him fix things around the house, the car, the yard... That way he will connect with Marc as well?
K

[mishka422]

That's the other reason I let him do these things. I just don't EVER ask him to do anything. If he takes it upon himself, I let him.

I try to NOT be there when he shows up, but I can't always do that. Like with the car yesterday, I couldn't go anywhere since he had the wheels off my car.

[Kalni]

Ask him and tell him why you ask him. Until he gives you money, assuming you wont have him locked up soon, he needs to trade off with you. Take your mom to the doctors, clean your car, your house, iron your clothes, cook...

[mishka422]

Hee hee!

[MichelleLT]

I completely agree!

Tell him, since you aren't working and paying CS, I do appreciate you helping out. And don't feel bad about asking him to do things!!!!! HE owes YOU and Marc!

[mishka422]

Yep, he owes me a lot of things, namely

1)my youth
2)my options
3)my self-respect
4)my self-worth

Yeah.....lots of things I'll never get back.

*sigh*

[Virtually_Handsome]

Whoa!

Too close to a pity party there, Mishka!

Your self worth and self respect come from inside you! Don't let him have that kind of power over you!

[mishka422]

It's more a matter of not having them to begin with and illusion of worth I had built up over the years was too tied in to my roles in our M, not in myself. Not being pitiful, just honest. You know I have a hard time seeing anything good coming out of this Jeff. There really aren't enough years left too fix all that's broken so I live as much as I can, am as open as possible without revealing too much of the damaged parts, and push through to the next day to do it all over again.

It is what it is and I've grown to accept that. I found my limits when I pushed my boundaries a little too far so I live within them.

I'm so pooped out today. My allergies have been killing me for 2 weeks now and Claritin isn't doing a darned thing for me. I only got about 4 hours of sleep last night because of my work schedule so that isn't helping. Think I'll go home, make some dinner for mom and Marc and go to bed. BIG YAWN!

Y'all have a great evening!!!!