Hi again CIPA I agree with PMA_Baby and then I don't. I agree with PMA when I'm pissed. My H just recently made the first statement about reconciling. He's been taking action for longer than that, but only recently made the first statement about wanting to come home. Now that I have finally heard the words I've wanted to hear and he's been showing effort into us, the anger, as predicted has surfaced for me. So then I turn to Mach1, BeginnersMind, Trapt, Jimbo, 2getherbutapart, AJM to talk me off the ledge....to not blow up at him. When I'm pissed about how I've been treated.....man I could choke him and then I agree with PMA that she is not taking responsibility in any of this and she needs to.
BUT when I'm not pissed, when I'm full on in my DBing mode, which I KNOW I still need to be in 100% of the time, because despite recent break throughs, this ain't over, I don't agree with PMA. Then I think that she is coming around. We all know she and my H aren't going to come back on hands and knees and say "I was wrong. I screwed up. I was selfish. You ARE the greatest thing that ever happened to me. You are the person who made me a parent, part of a solid team....blah blah blah, etc. etc. etc." So with that, you have to hold on. You can't get mad yet. You have to hold on because I think, in my humble opinion, she's coming around. She does know you are a good thing and she is about to possibly lose you. She does know she loves you and she's admitted to being scared. So pace yourself. Keep moving forward with what you have to do for you and the boys. But I think there are some clear signs here: She said she was scared. She can't answer you "Yes, please stay so we can work this out" but she also hasn't said again "It doesn't matter to me where you live and work because we are divorcing. It only matters to the kids." Am I the only person who caught that? And the muffins?????? I love that she made you muffins. That was effort and thought and you were behind both. AMAZING for a woman who not that long ago wanted out......or am I again the only person who thinks that? I think you are doing everything right.
