Remember Michelle's advice - DON'T PANIC. She's going through a thing right now, and it'll take time, regardless of which way it goes. Don't react to anything, and don't snoop... Give her space.
Yes this is killing you. Everyone on the board has been killed many times over - I know I have, and I still get killed again at times. You are amongst friend here. It isn't fair, it isn't right, but it is what it is. But, it is also quite possible, in many cases likely, that it won't stay like it is.
Oh, the reason I say 'don't snoop' is to give yourself a break. It is easy to read a lot into things, especially for the worst, when in reality "things are not always as they appear..." It'll just drive you nuts anyway. So, don't push her away, just continue to be cool... It's hard, very hard, but you can do it. You really have no other choice. So, go do something for yourself. You probably won;t be able to clear your mind of the situation, but you can engage yourself in something, I bet, which might help you, even if just a little bit.
Take care...your situation will not always be this way.
Me: 46 W: 46 M: 9.5 yrs D4, D9 D filed by her 11/3/08 Agrees to try rec at mediation 1/28/09 Says she still wants D in counseling 3/25/09 W and I back in DB counseling (!) 8/20/09 3rd Bomb 9/2/09
