I feel like I am operating in a vacuum

[cville22901]

sgctxon, gardener, & antlers:
Today was better than most. No emails to the wife and no phone calls. It was tough concentrating at work at times, but it's a process of incremental steps. I went to a social event tonight with the club that I joined. It was very low key and a lot of fun. Tomorrow night, I'm going to try my hand at canoeing. Haven't been in one of those in a about 30 years. Then, we'll do munchies and soft drinks. I'll try to embrace as much of this as I can. Being around new people is a bit of a challenge, but it sure beats sitting around the apartment and moping. The spouse ain't coming back. I just need to fully buy into that reality. It is not going to be an option. When I lapse into thinking that she will, then I start going in those crazy circles. I need to make it my mantra, "She's gone, gone, gone." If I repeat it a million times, maybe I'll fully accept it. I think that I am up to about 147,987.