No it's not Tourettes, but then, not everyone can comfortably do the potty-mouth thing, LOL. Very cool, though--and your H obviously had no problem with it, just the XOW and that's a very good sign.
Hmmm...your office visit makes me think of something. Eight years ago, we were given a puppy that is half wolf. She was different right from the start, more intelligent, different eating habits, etc.
On her first vet visit, the vet talked to me about the challenges of owning a wolf-hybrid. He told me that we should never play tug-of-war games with her or any other activities that invited her to display dominance over her humans.
He said that she would challenge me, as the only female in the house, and would try various things to see if she could dominate me. It's basic wolf social behavior, there's one alpha male and one alpha female in every pack. The vet told me that whenever the pup tried to get uppity with me, I should whip her legs out from under her, get her on her back, bite her neck and growl---showing her that I intended to remain the alpha female of the house!
Well, your little trip to the office (like mine) reminds me of that. Establishing mate behavoir and territory to the wannabes. I just curled up my lip and showed a little more, well, FANG! LOL
(OK, nobody make any bad jokes about peeing around the perimeters to mark our areas!)
P.S. OK, now is your H an attorney too? I'm having trouble figuring out the logic of the sitch with XOW co-worker. Why would he lose his job? Is she extorting him in some way? Could there be something she could extort with, or has she at least convinced him that she could do something to hurt him in various ways?
It sounds as though he has some fear about her, especially when it comes to firing her.
I'm glad you're seeing an attorney yourself to get realistic advice. Do you have all the information you need about what your H could be afraid of? Maybe he doesn't feel comfortable disclosing his fears to you, while you both are still trying to heal. Maybe he's the one that needs to get some strong legal advice about how to get rid of the XOW.
Alpha female returning to her lair with a belly full of aspiring rival (and sushi)
What Shiny, very reasonably, meant is that since my H is her employer, OW could threaten to sue him for sexual harassment and make his life difficult. But my attorney and I think she would not have a case: she had been involved with my H on and off for 1 1/2 year before going to work for him (and then he had no power over her whatsoever). Also her letters to me confess to a consensual relationship. And she cannot sue for breach of promise when she knew he was married...
As to the info, all I have is that. I am not aware of anything else, but who knows...
Yes, I got an attorney when I kicked him out and we filed for D when I found out the truth about the OW (and it was on the basis of adultery, no 'no fault' nonsense for me: it was a clear cause of fault). We have not served him yet, though. He reacted much better than I had even dreamed of and I decided to give him a chance.
And you are right, I cannot do the Tourette's thing: I lack the amplitude of vocabulary (at least in any language OW is likely to understand). And my mother would wash my mouth with soap if she heard. But I can do the 'lady-of-the-manor-on-finding-one-of-the-housemaids-cavorting-with-the-cookboy' thing to a nicety. Without straining my pinky!
"You don't throw a whole life away just 'cause it's banged up a little"
Tom Smith in "Seabiscuit"
Hi there. Thanks for leaving me the link to your thread. It was great to get an understanding of your sitch and to know that there is the possibility of my H returning sometime. I LOL at the office visit and even though I have been assured that there is no OW, I may have to take the boys to visit Daddy one of these afternoons while big sister is at school.
And to all of you on the BB, I appreciate any insight to the male mind or if you are aware of other threads that may boost the PMA. Optimist provides me with a great deal of support as do the rest of you who stop by my thread (H Unhappy and left)
Way to go today Optimist! What a great example to those of us new to the experience!
totite
"Accentuate the positive, eliminate the negative..."
But I can do the 'lady-of-the-manor-on-finding-one-of-the-housemaids-cavorting-with-the-cookboy' thing to a nicety. 
Without straining my pinky! 
