John, I am working on the separation of things. That is why I have taken the initiative to get all my stuff out of the storage unit we got when I moved here. That is also why I have been packing up anything/everything he left here and putting it into the storage unit, getting it out of the house. I don't want there to be any of 'him' left here, because he doesn't live here. It makes it easier for me.
And we haven't spent any time together until last night, because he has been gone to Canada. He leaves for Chicago on Thursday for another trip. Last night was not his night on the calendar, but he showed up and the kids were so excited because they miss him. So I tried to stay out of the way and let him have his time with them. I intend to tell him that I want him to start spending his time with the kids outside of the house, I just had no opportunity to do that yesterday, since he was with the kids and Nathan kept coming out of his bedroom.
That will suck too because all of Nathan's toys/games are here, so I don't know what they will do. Guess he could load their bikes in his trunk and take them to the park. But then he would drop them off and never put them to bed? His son is crying for him! I don't know how all of this is going to work since he sleeps at his parents and has no home base. I realize that is all his doing and I am great with him feeling the consequences but it sucks for the kids. I don't know what the happy medium is between him being here when I am and me telling him to spend all his time with them out of the home without me...maybe there isn't one.
I think Dan and I need to meet with someone asap (like Nathan's counselor) to get the best approach for just telling them we are not ever going to be together again and things are going to be different in terms of spending time together...
Forgot to mention when Nathan came to my room crying for his dad I had him call Dan. B/C one thing Dan said the other night when this was going on and he was in Canada was, "Why don't you ever let them call me when they are like that? If they want me, have them call me". So, I did.
Nathan got off the phone and said his dad said they could do whatever he wanted after swim lessons tonight (that'll fix things!?!)...I said, fun! What will you choose? He said, "I want mommy AND daddy..." Good luck with that one, Dan
