Wow MB! That was a lot to read! Also haven't been here in about 10 days, which doesn't help, but I got a glass of wine to drink while reading!
I think it's GREAT that your H supported you in this way, handling D18, working as a parent team. It could have easily been a lot more awkward with him (partially) supporting her, undermining your authority and spinning everything WAYYY out of control! Working as a team should also help you two bond in that way. That's good to hear! Also glad to hear you and your friends are having fun at a 22 yr old boys' expense!
Keep the course MB! You're bound to hit land sooner or later!