So it begins to get over my wife

[sandi2]

but what happens after i've went this route for a few days? is she going to be blowing up my phone?

Hey, sounds like you gettin kinda nervous there buddy. Just kidding. You gave me the best laugh I've had all day....

I agree that she should not be allowed to just slip back in without any explanations and play like nothing ever happened . You are 100% correct in that your techniques will not change anything about the M until she does some changes....and especially does some growing up. The fact that she may want to return does not mean that you have to allow her to return. I think that is a bad misconception of immature WAW's. They think if they decide to walk, they can decide to return when they get ready. Well, they may not have welcoming arms if they decide to go back home! That is only one reason I think she should not have it so quick & easy about returning. She left on "her" terms but I think she should return on "your" terms. Of course, that mean she should have anything to say in the matter at all, but I still think that since she left and you remained in the home, that it should primarly be up to you under the conditions that she comes back. I bet she hasn't even considered that possibility. She thinks you would be so happy if she went back home. That is why she is shocked that she hasn't been able to snap her fingers and you didn't hop! Now, she's really wondering what is going on.

I didn't want to imply that the two of you shouldn't talk before she comes back or that you didn't deserve an explanation....or even an apology, but I'm saying not to hold your breath before you are pleased at what she tells you. I don't know her and she may be the dramatic type who falls down crying and begging for your forgiveness.....I don't know. Makes it easier, I suppose, if she would.

I wanted you to expect the undesired effects. That seems to be my theme song tonight. Expect the worst scenario and know that you would be fine if "that" happened and you could move forward, then you'll be able to deal with it "if" it plays out.

Later,
Sandi