Yay!!!!! Finally a new thread.

[AlexEN]

Hence the "Focus on yourself" part that we all get told. It's so true.

It also seems to be why we often see the LBS becoming the WAS. In the case where the LBS really really focuses and changes and grows, they then start to really see the problems in the R and become more wary of the changes that the WAS is NOT making.

When (if) the WAS then comes back, does the LBS still want them?

I know I am asking myself this question. Even though my W is not coming back, I am seriously asking my self, if she does, do I want it? Under what conditions? I know others here who are asking themselves the same things.

I didn't believe it at the time but I was modeling to my wife and showing her how to change. (read leading) We think we are the ones with all the issues when we first roll in here. ON key to piecing is supporting and loving them thru their "snake killing." My marraige is in a much more mature and solid place. DB tuition is high I was not about to let my education go to waste.
Cheers

Coach,

If only we were all so lucky as to have a Greek on the other side of the equation...

If we're all being realistic, we also have to acknowledge that even if one were able to mimic your leading to the nth degree, not all WAS will follow the lead and have the wherewithall themselves to kill the snakes...

It certainly increases the likelihood of an outcome like yours, but at the end of the day, both parties have to make changes, if party A can't lead it won't work and if party B doesn't/can't/won't "follow" it may not work either, but in either instance the leader will be the better for it...

Yes? No?

-AlexEN