Went to TX for my S17's bball tourney. They played hard and we all had fun. I drove down with another teammate and his mom. Her H has been unfaithful several times, but they keep working at things. Seems God is putting people around me as examples of perseverance and unconditional love. Had interesting dreams and woke up one day just feeling this very calm sense that I'm doing the right thing by standing strong, staying committed and giving H the space and time to work on himself. Listened to the radio on the way back... songs like Hold on Loosely and lots of Van Morrison seemed to be sending me messages about how to handle things... I don't know, but it felt like a sign I'm doing the right thing.
Still no comm. from H. That's the hardest part. But I have to keep turning it back over to God. I will keep taking care of myself, things at home and with the kids. And if God leads H back to me, I'll be better, stronger, and ready. If he doesn't, then there is another plan. But at this point, and I keep praying about this, I don't feel like I'm supposed to move on. So, I wait.
It's mid-July and H hoped to move to the mountains in Aug/Sept. So there could be big changes coming. Will try to prepare myself for whatever may be coming... D papers, moving away, more talks, who knows!?!
Goals for the week:
exercise read, some for fun and some for growth work around the house and yard doing something fun for me, maybe a pedicure or highlights
