I don't know what he is doing, to be honest, but I am living my life. I still miss him horribly, but the pain is not as severe and the lows are not a low anymore. We had a very affectionate relationship--lots of touching, kissing, hugs, etc.--and that is alot of what I miss the most. Is he drifting back? I don't know, but I can hope.
She might have been the one to put pressure if she knew about the cc, but more and more I am thinking it was a knee jerk reaction--either to the cash advance or my going out of town. It is what it is.
I saw him for a few hours yesterday--only at the picnic--and I did not bring it up. I do not plan to bring it up. I can't change it and it will surely spark a fight, so why bother. I am not angry about it, just hurt by the secrecy and sneaky way he does some things.
I am doing really well at not being the Old Me. I am still working on the complaining about DH. For the most part though, I take it to the altar at church, my mom, and my DB friends that I speak to offline. I do not want to involve my family, obviously definitely NOT his family, and I do not want to lose anymore friends than I already have as a result of this.
I am standing back and standing firm. God is my strength and I am so grateful for His boundless grace and mercy.
Living God's blessings with grace and dignity~ SMW
M40/H36 T16/M14 4K B2/08 S4/08 current
Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. I Corinthians 13:7
