I really like what you wrote...I may use some of it! Thanks.
IMO...you should try to deal with the kid logistics first (I may need to take my own advice)...
But, as a premise for us to remember (which is more important than what they think at this point), we are not responsible for their behavior or feelings.
We have been physically separated since February, and the kid logistics have for the most part, under the circumstances, been pretty good. School, activities, and such, have gone pretty well...with each of us taking care of these things when it was our turns to have the kids. Vacations, as I've mentioned, have been a sticking point.
We can control our thoughts, feelings, and actions...but we can't control theirs. So we have to do what we think is right...and let them think what they will!
"Always go straight forward, and if you meet the devil, cut him in two and go between the pieces." - William Sturgis, clipper ship captain, 1830's.
