Oh I`m getting used to the not being invited thing!
He`s off to a concert tonight. Bought two tickets six months ago. That was back in the days I used to snoop through his email:that`s how I found out about the tickets and the (price-$250 :o)
At the time I speculated on who the tickets were for-not me anyway! Maybe he was going with his brother? Another friend? The co worker he had a fling with?
Hmmm
Fast forward to last week and he finally gets around to telling me "Huh, I`m going to a concert next Sunday. I asked DS14 but he doesn`t want to come"
I took it all very lightly and suggested he ask DS11.
Today is concert day.Its apparent that neither of my sons are going-one is away all the day, the other tentatively making plans that do not include the concert. And I`m thinking OMG would H actually go to a concert on his own and sit beside an empty seat that he paid for?Isn`t a pop concert something you would enjoy with someone? And dammnit I`d hate one of my kids to miss a chance of a free ticket. So I persuaded DS11 to go.
H was happy to take him. In our chat last week H had mentioned that he`s a loner. I don`t think he`s a happy loner but I think the concert sitch shows that yeah, he fantasises about having company(buying two tickets) but can`t seem to do anything to get it.
Ok so much for detaching, I know I got sucked into his problems today. Maybe its all part of the crazy world of the MLCer.
Oh and as for not being invited along Sleeper I`d be shocked at this stage if I were. In the past this is one area H has dithered on "Do you want to come? Why do you want to come? I don`t think you should come"Head wrecking stuff. I think I put a stop to all that with the recent wedding debacle. More crazy stuff.
Sleeper:I know you got a bit of a whipping for holding out hope for your` nut job`(not my words!) W. Well, they`re all nut jobs. And maybe we are too! I think this craziness is something bred by BOTH people. And I believe one spouse on their own can do a massive part if not 100% of healing BOTH.(Read "Zero Limits" on this poorly written IMHO but with an interesting concept) First we`ve to heal ourselves,(loving detaching, GAL), we`ve to listen really listen to what our spouse is saying and watch how they`re treating us and figure out our sh1t in the whole process(that helps us grow) then bless the other person and their actions. And leave the whole bones of the marriage out to a Higher Power to heal and piece together if that can be done.
