I disagree. It categorically does matter. For my "wife" to tell outright lies to her sister (and the gods know who else) -- indeed, to tell a story 180-degrees from the truth, to say up is down and left is right and white is black, does matter. Let's avoid the mind-reading, as tempting as it is. SHE chose to divorce me. It's not my fault the law says "spousal support." That's something she might have looked up. "Oh," says she, "well I didn't think you'd take it" -- and off we go on the Batsh*t-Crazy Express.
This situation -- here, now, regardless of how "started" -- is her creation.
So why lie? Why bring it up at all, if she can't tell the truth?
And let's mind-read a bit -- or project or forecast or whatever.
Because think about it this way -- just how much more complicated does that make the DB'ing process if one's goal is reconciliation? Why would she reconcile with someone -- whatever she might want -- whom all of her friends despise as a result of HER fables? What kind of relationship would she expect ME to have with HER friends -- and let's remember, WAW is nothing if not famously true and close to her friends -- knowing what they must think of me, as a result of HER TALL TALES?
If it's a strategy to prevent herself from entertaining thoughts of reconciling, it's brilliant: "Well, how would I explain this to the ladies? To my sister? I couldn't. Oh well!"
Of all the things I don't get, I don't get this the most. Outright falsehoods. Not spin, not lies by omission -- outright distortion. "Weekly Word News" stuff.
Why does it matter? Knowing this -- knowing that she lied so completely, to her own sister, how can I -- the undesirable LBS whom she can't be rid of soon enough -- how can I believe A...Single...Effing....Word....She....Says? It's her sister -- presumably she has no need to lie. Hell, her sister didn't even know what spousal support was! WAW could have said, "I'm p*ssed at SP because the law says I have to pay him alimony," or "This D keeps getting worse becuase now I've learned X," or etc.
But she chose to lie. To say, "SP says the sky is green," when I'd just prepared a notarized, 300-page, affidavit that my point-of-view is that the sky is blue.
*Knocking head against wall ----------------------------------
Made a catastrophic blunder today. Couldn't be helped, really, but for whatever reason I was so happy to have the trip with the kids I didn't think of the implications. Today Smiley's Person was just outside of Big Midwestern City. Today I went to a wedding. Bad juju.
First came the pitying looks.
Then came the female family elders with the clucking tongues and the "she must be crazy"s and the "my friend Sara has a daughter your age who'd be perfect for you -- now she's a little heavy but so sweet"s and so on and so on and so on.
Then came the exchange of vows, where everyone who is married is invited by the Man O' Cloth to think on the meaning of marriage and yada yada you know what happens next he busts out the Corinthians. And not the leather kind.
But okay, I keep it together, I man the battle stations, I accept the brutal reality of my situation, I handle it -- I've got two kids in tow, I TCB.
And the reception. Good and plenty. A little drink, a little eat, the kids are playing with the other kids, all is well. Now comes the OTHER elderly ladies, those I don't know, those from the other side of the wedding party as well as friends of friends with the nieces and the nephews who are (hushed voice) "going through what your going through, you know, divorce" and do I have any advice for them?
So that's a bit of a struggle, because I feel like I have a green head and two antennae and everyone is looking at me, but the kids are happy and D6 busts out with the Hannah Montana karaoke and is the hit of the evening.
And the evening wears on and the line forms to the left for the karaoke (yeah, I know, karaoke at a wedding reception? Well, everyone was happy, so why not?) when......
It happens.
I mean it had to happen, right? The D.J. only has 1,000 songs on his computer.
Someone sings it. The song. The song with HER name in it. The song ABOUT her name. The song I used to sing her, teasingly, when we were courting. The song everyone loves to sing along to.
Ho...Lee...Farking Fark! How the farking fark does this farking happen to me?
Just when you think you're detached. Just when you think, "Hey, I'm doing purrr-ity dam good" -- BOOM! If it's not a smell, it's a song.
