I also spoke with W on the phone(which surprised me that she even did that, of course it all surprised me) and simply told her that we could still drop this and I would work in what ever way I could to be fair in this situation. I was very carefult to tell her that I wasn't trying to be pushy or tell her what to do, or that I was being controlling. I acknowledged to her that I see the issues with control and overbearing that I didn't recognize before. She said she was glad I did. I then told her that I understand her need for separation, she was glad I understood that too, but didn't agree with how she went about it. I didn't go into anything that I thought would be confrontational. I told her that I knew it wasn't much but I gave her my word that the sad puppy days were gone, that Ive already seen in my counseling that I have no control over her and that I cant change her mind. I said I know if you want a divorce then you'll get a divorce, all I can do is work on me. My request was that we stop this before it goes to court and hurts a lot of people for no real reason. I also assured her that weither she drops it or the court does, I wont bother her. She didn't say one way or another if she would or not, cause I didn't ask for an answer. I just asked her to consider dropping the R-order.
I know I probably screwed up, but I've felt like she needed to know these things, cause it wasn't like she could see them any other way. I know it may have been only words to her but I think if nothing else it give her something new to think about when her head hits pillow at night.
My question is this, why talk to me at all on the phone? She never had problems hanging up on me before? She went as far as to blatantly break the R-order this time. One thing I don't think it is, I doubt its guilt... shes never felt guilty for anything, she always feels like what ever justification she has makes it right. What do you think? I appreciate you keeping track of me here.
On a funny note, I once met a bunch of kids from Alaska when I was on a trip as a child. When they found out I was from Texas they wanted to know if I was a cowboy(I am) and if I had oil rigs, and bunch of longhorn cattle(I don't). I thought that was funny. I asked them if they all lived in igloos. I didnt really think that, but they thought that stuff of me. After all my travels around the states and the world in the military, it seems everyone thinks that of Texans... Did you grow up there?
