H and I went through "Choosing Wisely" program. I don't think he thought much of it at all since he doesn't believe in the Bible and this program is Bibically based.
Getting him to finish off the "Choosing Wisely" program was an effort. He was very busy with school and didn't make it a priority. I told him that and of course that turned into a fight. During that fight I mentioned something about counseling and he whined "Oh, now I have to do that???" After the fact, of course, he said that was just a heat of the moment thing and he didn't really mean it. (yeah right)
So we went to our first counseling session and after 1.5 hours of talking to her, she recommended that H get counseling on his own. After she heard his life story and family history, (a train wreck), she said that he needs to figure himself out first before he works on a marriage.
That night he brought dinner over. I told him something I've been thinking about for about a month now - I want to see his cell phone bill. At first he laughed it off. But when I pursued, he basically said "I failed". When I asked about him being intimate with her again he said "once". (Yeah right again). They were working on a project together and it just happened - "I don't want to talk about it".
After that, I told him that I can't talk to him anymore and I won't stand for the disrespect.
I know I've said it once before. But right after that he then agreed to go to "Choosing Wisely" and gave me his word through the "Promise Plan" that he would only see her in school and not call her. I didn't do the Transparency Plan. But I got the info I need without a Transparency Plan.
When I told him that I don't want to talk to him anymore or see him, he said that he's going to get his sh1t together and he hopes this counselor can help him. He says the stupidest things like "Don't worry, this R is ending. It's definitely fading away". (With OW). "The thing that sucks is that she is in all my classes. I guess I don't have to talk to her. She'll eventually get the hint." !!!!!!! What is wrong with this man that he thinks he has to give hints??? Can't he just be a man and tell someone something directly rather than hinting???
He's all about not wanting to hurt anybody which doesn't make a bit of sense considering what he's done.
This is all like a bad nightmare. What in the %$#!@ is is going to take? I don't plan on staying separated forever. I don't want to be married to someone like this.
Lucky for me, I have God in my life and he has given me and continues to give me so much strength, joy and happiness in my life. It is crazy!!! I don't know how it can be but it is.
I'm thinking about filing, but it is so hard. I'm getting closer to being ready but I just don't want to make a decision I will regret. Of course, I think a bigger regret would be to stay with this lying, cheating man.
Going to pray about it.
Last edited by Belle; 07/11/0903:58 AM.
M:36 H:36 M 3 Y T 8 Y No kids Bomb 6/30/08 PA I filed 9/29/09 D final 1/22/2010
