What to do when H doesn't contact?

[beepee]

Hi Lost:

I know how you feel about the no contact thing. my H walked out on me and its been a month. i was doing the usual begging pleading through email because thats the only way i could get thru to him. and he ignored me for awhile and then answered some of my emails. the difference between you and i, is that i'm the one with depression and my H left because he couldnt take it anymore. i wish my H was like you and wanted to work thru the depression together but he doesnt and theres nothing i can do. i havent spoken or seen him in a month and its been the toughest thing ive ever gone thru, especially having depression and dealing with it on my own when i thought my H who vowed to be there in sickness and in health would hold my hand thru this extremely tough time.

the only thing you can do is change for the better and do it for yourself. he wont be around to see any changes you make but im sure that he will come around after awhile of NC unless he really doesnt have a heart and in that case you have to re-evaluate why you still want to be with him. being depressed myself, hes going through A LOT. its really tough to have this illness so be patient with him. no one around me was patient with me and that really hurt me and put me into a deeper depression. but the point is, he is definitely going thru a tough time, i know its not right of him to leave you and your children and not contact but just be aware that the depression hes going thru is really clouding his thinking. i know i have trouble with this and i say things i dont mean and blame things on my H when i didnt mean any of it, i was just do depressed and the only thing i could do to get better was go to C and take medication but no one can force him to do that. my H kept forcing me and i wanted to but by the time i did, it was too late and he had already left me.

so lost, give it time, patience is key. my H hardly contacts me and it hurts SO BAD, i know. but your life is so precious and you need to think about yourself and make yourself happy. thats the only way you're going to be able to get thru this, with or without him. you need to continue living your life as if he is never coming back, as harsh as that may sound. because only then can you detach yourself from him and live your life for YOU because YOU MATTER. i have a hard time teling myself that everyday because i miss my H so much but i think about the things that hes done to me and i have to think, why am i pining over a man who doesnt want to be with me? so i just have to move on and if he comes back, great, if he doesnt, i will have already reached a point where i dont need him. i know i can do it and i know YOU CAN DO IT TOO!!