Hey TF Tough day, but you have to let it go. As often as we tell each other to back off, there are going to be backslides....we expect it. They suck adn you just deal and keep moving forward.
Ok, let me try to break this down. I understand it now, but have a hard time explaining it....so bear with me.
Don't believe anything they say, right? Here's why....pretend I'm showing you the inside of his head as he's saying this.
"I am trying to distance myself from you....I don't want to be in this relationship." Inside his head, he can say this with no or little damage because he believes he may be lying....he's not sure. He MAY want out, but he may want to come back, if his "new life" isn't all that great. Now because HE understands he may be back, there some weirdness about them that makes him think you don't believe him either, you sort of know he might be lying.....so that makes it's ok to say this crappy crap.
Does that make any sense?
So why does he say it? Well, he says it because he THINKS he may want out...he's not sure, so he needs to tell you this just in case his "new great life" does work out....saying this to you now is insurance just in case he is happy without you, he can say "Look, I warned you, I told you from the beginning I was leaving.....blah blah blah."
Does this help....???? In his mind this is easy to say because in his mind he HAS NOT thrown away 18 years.....he's only thinking about it.
Do you get me? It's hard to explain....I hope I helped.
