A Wife that has come back? Post Affair feelings ,,

[Deep]

Thanks once again for the replies.

Sandi, while I might not agree with all you say, I do appreciate your candor and words of comfort, and I do agree with some blunt things you have said even if I don't like facing up to it. W has to stop running away from problems, but it's not something I feel I can talk to her calmly about for now.

As for "OW", yes, she probably felt close to an EA towards our closest period (and she had kicked her H out by then) - I never saw it as anything other a potential bad decision and a path to a huge mess. Which was why I kept it on an even keel. W was at fault but I knew OM manipulated her in her weakness too, and I did not want to be anything like him. Thus, I guess as far as the EA went, I just felt you couldn't have an A with just one willing party right.

As for being fair over "meeting" over business, I have no big issues if W were to run into OM at times. The world is only so big. "OW" and I may be in the same industry, but our companies have no biz relationship, we don't have to (and don't) talk for work, and it's only at industry association pow wows that we may meet as part of a group. W on the other hand is officially the Relationship Manager for OM (what an ironic title eh). She has to work with the companies he owns on a daily basis, help plan their financial cashflow, lobby and arrange for trade financing. Her efficiency is measured partly by how successful she helps make his companies. I think she's serviced him enough. THAT'S the difference.

But you're right. I do feel I've lived with a lot pent up (if not outright lies as you put it).

GH: Thanks for the kind support mate. I just had a long talk with one of our CORE group members. He also told me it's about time I talk to W as he saw my issues potentially exploding in not too distant a future. He gave me some suggestions and told me to pick my timing and words carefully.

I know only too well what you mean by "having to do it". I think I've kept it under wraps for long enough. I know I have to do something.

Can't help taking a deep breath as I type this though ... I just hope I'm not flipping the switch to another torrid, semmingly endless rollercoaster.

Thanks again.