I think the key to doing this Orich, is that you have to pull ALLL the way back on acting like her husband. Treat her like a roommate, or the mailman, nothing more. Because if she gets some of her physical and emotional needs met by OM, and some of her emotional, financial and security needs met by you, she'll NEVER make a choice.
Us humans are, at the end of the day, path-of-least-resistance creatures, and we rarely do ANYTHING until we have to.
