Looks like DB has worked on several levels. Good job. Time for really look inward and seeing what you want. I would say if you two do "get back together" part of it should be getting MC that is solution-focused. Helps to have that support and 3rd party input.
H35 W34 S4 | T-10 yrs M-6 yrs WAW said M over 04/09 | Living separate since 09/09 Thread #1 Thread #2 Thread #3
a) shows that she does not set the agenda -- you do;
b) creates mystery
c) demonstrates that you have decisions to make as well.
d) gives her time to worry about losing you
So I take it you decided not to try this . . .
puppy, i did consider this. somethings happened to me this last 6 days. i don't think i really care anymore. i'm not going to be vindictive to her, but honestly yesterday was one of the biggest days i've ever had where i could care less if W called or contacted me. i don't know what to say about it. honestly, i'm fine if she doesn't ever come back. i don't think i want this new dog here for any longer then tomorrow tho. it's already had two accidents since it's been here and it's only been an hour it's acting squirrelly as hell too.
i don't know what to tell you what i'm thinking about right now. i'm not sure i even want to try anymore with her. i've thought about it the last couple days, and i don't know what i want. i think i've given up, which is pretty sad, but at this point, it's like what else do i have to lose by giving up? she's already gone and has stayed gone. really why am i fighting for someone who doens't know what the heck they want? i want a relationship where someone is fighting for me for a change. this isn't it.
You claim you've "given up," and you don't care, yet you can't even push off her demand for a meeting by a day or two, or say "no" to her when you asks you to dog-sit for you unannounced?
Hmmmm...
Look, even if you completely give up on your marriage, you're STILL going to need to learn to set (and enforce) effective boundaries, as she will forever still be in your life in some capacity. Or, do you plan on going completely dark on her should you divorce, since you have no kids?
You claim you've "given up," and you don't care, yet you can't even push off her demand for a meeting by a day or two, or say "no" to her when she asks you to dog-sit for you unannounced?
Hmmmm...
Look, even if you completely give up on your marriage, you're STILL going to need to learn to set (and enforce) effective boundaries, as she will forever still be in your life in some capacity. Or, do you plan on going completely dark on her should you divorce, since you have no kids?
Puppy
i don't know what i want. if it's not going to work out, no i don't really want her in my life in any aspect. there are no kids. right now, maybe i'm just carelessly coasting. i'm drained and tired of this all, and just want it over with in some regard. she didn't demand anything really, she just said she's coming over tomorrow again. should i have told her no? idk the answer to that. i don't actually remember saying anything to her about it, just "sure" when she asked if she could leave the dog here. she said she thought it might be nice for me to have another companion here. i didn't say anything about it after she made the comment.
it's all whatever to me right now. i'm tired. tired of fighting for something that doesn't seem to mean anything to anyone else but me. i'm not doing anything one way or another with this whole sitch for awhile. i need to go take a nap.
i don't think i'm going to respond. maybe in a couple hours. puppy, is this what you meant by don't forget how i got to where i am now? i don't need to be melted cheese man do i? i admit i don't think anything went wrong today, but it's not like she is beating my door down right now either. i guess, i'll wait ahile
it's acting squirrelly as hell too.
