Over the Shock and GALing 6

[Thinker]

Thanks OD, I figured you would be able to understand the true meaning of those rides...

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Thanks Greek and Sara, It really does help to have your points of view - get's me thinking in different directions, which is exactly what I need.

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Well, after noodling on it a bit, I think I found the root cause of (at least some of) the recent anger.

Last week (as planned) the boys and I went to my extended family's beach reunion. Mrs. Thinker went to visit her mom instead. We had a great time, and due to the fun and some cell phone difficulties we were barely able to even call Mrs. Thinker. She felt excluded.

This weekend is another Thinker family event (My Dad's 70th). She is not comfortable around my family right now, so when she started to drag her feet a couple of days ago, I said "I'm going. Whether you come, stay, or do something else is completely up to you" (or something similar). I was giving her options, but was probably pretty abrupt about it. I was tired of everything. She felt uninvited, excluded, and hurt. She wanted me to want her to go, and I had not said that.

She lashed out then, and then again, and then again today...

So...

this evening over dinner I said "I'd like to press reset, or rewind, or whatever... I would like you to go with me to the party this weekend. It would make me happy." She agreed to go.

Sometimes it's the stupid little misunderstandings...I thought she was trying to avoid going and was giving her the DB "I don't really care if you go or not, I'm going". In fact, she felt excluded and wanted to be asked to go...

Immediate sitch diffused...

...Although I know I am going to catch hell for this in the future as "Just one more example" of how I "can be so unreasonable and hurtful"