Did you get a chance to read the thread I directed you to? It gives lots of information on some "root" causes of MLC. Things that happen in childhood. Many of the people that enter MLC were forced to grow up too fast or skip major transitionary periods in their lives. They are also "emotional stuffers" - people who grew up not having their feelings validated so they created a "mask" of the persona that helped them "get by" in life. My H was always known as a laid back, optimistic guy. Little did I know there was something lurking deep within him. We had an extraordinary marriage & were best friends. Anyone who knows what I am going through is absolutely dumbfounded.
Eventually though his inner "child" that has been hidden for so long has decided to come out and assert itself & it is NOT pretty. They will begin to think of their spouse as the person that made them suppress who they were for all this time. They will see you as controlling & fight you every step of the way for the lot they were given in life. This may be the case for your H based on what he has told you about his childhood. Another topic to look up is narcissistic family of origin - they can be either "overt" (living w/alcoholics, drug addicts, etc.) or the less detectable "coverts" (parents that put their emotional needs above their child's).
The more you understand this, the easier it is to step back & see the situation for what it is. Once again, this is NOT about you - all H knows is he is not happy & cannot understand why so they will run around doing everything they can to fill the void. Finally they will see that noTHING will fill it. They must hit rock bottom & hopefully begin to look within themselves for the answers.
Me 36, Him 33 M 11yrs, T 15yrs S 8, D 7 ILYBINILWY - 1/09 H moves out 10/09 D to be final SOON I HOPE!
