Don't sacrifice your and your childrens' finances for your W's actions. Is there any way you can lock up your assets so she can't get to them?
Tell her that she is more than welcome to go. However she must find her own way to pay for it because you are saving the money for the children to LIVE on. Refuse to give her a single penny. Change the accounts if need be, but protect yourself.
Maybe setup a small account that's just for her with SOME money inside as an act of good faith, but tell her that she can only deposit and withdraw from that account. Your problem is that you are talking to her like a reasonable adult. She is not. She is a spoiled teenager who is crying when she doesn't get what she wants. You have to be the responsible one. Just do all this very calmly and matter of factly. Talk to her as if you were talking to one of your kids.
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.
