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Jimbo #1797092 07/08/09 05:16 PM
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Originally Posted By: Jimbo
Glad I haven't signed anything with her L yet. It's getting to be time for some renegotiation of terms.

This sucks.


Yes it is time.....YOU are in the better position though Jimbo. She abandoned the home. You get to decide. Listen you need to think of you right now.

She wants out....then fork over some cash. I know it sounds a little harsh, but you can't not do this in fear of destroying any chance for reconcilliation. You must look out for you.


Remember, lawyers are not the law, be reasonable and do not give ground when it comes to this. She needs to share in this as well.

If it comes down to it you may have to prepare yourself to put it on the market, and depending upon what you want, you can either sell or stay.


Don't stand still.
fisherman #1797280 07/08/09 09:27 PM
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Oh, I'm so sorry Jimbo. I've had a little stress and drama around too. Yep, it sucks. Definitely look out for you right now. You have to. No other choice.


"Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out."
Robert Collier

"One's best success often comes after their greatest disappointments."
Henry Ward Beecher

me 33, s 9, d 4
SoCo #1798672 07/10/09 08:08 PM
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Been busy with work, refi, and reaching back. Found out from title company that W needed to sign the quit claim deed before I could proceed with settlement on Monday, so had to contact W. Got a long and detailed email back telling me that my plan to come to her office that morning to get it done was fine, and that I could bring over the car titles too, and we could sign them as well. She then tells me how she has done all this research on how we can close out the joint bank accounts and credit cards. Then she proceeded to tell me (ala "Oh and before I forget...") that she's moved apartments "to a carpeted one bedroom with an awesome view", and gives me the new address.

The weird thing about all of this is that, unlike her previous emails, this one isn't a brief, one or two line job. It's actually.....warm. She thanks me by name, and even signs her own name at the end!

WTF?


PATIENCE AND FORTITUDE CONQUER ALL THINGS.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson

DBing and MLC take their toll....Please provide exact CHANGE.
-Jimbo
Jimbo #1799525 07/12/09 06:44 PM
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Jimbo, I agree w/Trusting from an earlier post that they like the dramatics.

I think your FB theory is probably right on target--way to see what you are up to. Go ahead and join...and post nothing interesting.


M: 16 years
Bomb 4/07
OW 20s long gone
Divorced 11/09
I remarried New Guy
Cooperative r w/X regarding D

forward #1800888 07/14/09 04:26 PM
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Originally Posted By: forward
Go ahead and join...and post nothing interesting.


Interesting approach, forward.

But I'm wondering...assuming that she really IS wondering what I'm up to...

Which might she see as more enticing:

Spying on her H and seeing that he's still doing nothing any more interesting than before she left...

or

Having all her attempts to spy on her H be thwarted, and having to wonder exactly WHAT he's doing?


I think I'll continue to opt for the mystery.


PATIENCE AND FORTITUDE CONQUER ALL THINGS.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson

DBing and MLC take their toll....Please provide exact CHANGE.
-Jimbo
Jimbo #1801166 07/14/09 09:38 PM
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Thanks for stopping by my thread with some hugs.

I think you should do the FB thing the way YOU want to, not as a way to get a reaction from you w, ya know? Personally, I wouldnt want my h as a friend on FB right now. But thats just me.

dl443322 #1801187 07/14/09 10:46 PM
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Well, there you go, Jimbo. Mystery is good.

Esp. if you posted at strange hours and then not at others that would be more predictable.


M: 16 years
Bomb 4/07
OW 20s long gone
Divorced 11/09
I remarried New Guy
Cooperative r w/X regarding D

forward #1801323 07/15/09 03:34 AM
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Jimbo, first things first... eat something dude. The LBS diet can sometimes last a bit too long. Go have some ribs and yes, get dessert.

Look, I know I sometimes sound like a downer, but for God's sake please don't post at wierd times on FB, set up strategies to make her curious, blah blah blah blah. Just fricken be yourself dude.

I sometimes wonder if some of us enjoy self torture and simply do not feel the release of pressure in fully letting go. You remind me somewhat of another pretty boy around here who used to get tortured for his hamster issues.

Have you ever seen the movie "For the love of the Game"?

The main character, Billy Chapel, uses a technique called clearing the mechanism to help him with crowd noise and such so he can stay focused on pitching. You should check it out, you coudl use a clear the mechanism approach to your sitch sometimes.


Ian


M- 48
XW- mentally 17
KIDS- 3- S19, D23, D28
Married- 17 years
Divorce final- 10/16/09

sofaraway #1801427 07/15/09 12:36 PM
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Ian,

Stop telling everyone you think I'm pretty.

I do have to agree with you, when you finally let go totally and stop giving power to the craziness. The feeling of relief is incredible.


Don't stand still.
fisherman #1803195 07/17/09 05:01 PM
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Jimbo-
Just checking in on your sitch. Thanks for responding to me over on the Newbies board.

MW





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