W is having Affair -- may leave soon -- thread 2

[S.T. _I Made It!]

you know what. it's all the same. every one on here basically has the same issues. we were all married because we thought and believed that person to be the one for us for life, but somewhere down the road both people failed. they failed in showing their love in the way the other person needed it. Read the 5 love languages (that is another good book). I could go on why As happen, but the basic thing is this. no matter what his goal is he still needs to do the same thing, Focus on himself, not on her.

you can take my advice however you'd like. but kicking someone out is a big decision and you better make sure that is what you want.

If people can handle the emotions tied to it, and be able to still control their feelings and GAL like they need to, I always advise not to kick the other person out. The more time you are able to show the WAS your changes, the easier and faster it will be for them to believe it and want to come back.

the WAS won't ever come back unless they see and believe a change has happened and that it will last. this takes time and sometimes a long time. During an A, they are really sick. they are living in a fog and are consumed by their feelings. I know, I have been on both sides. there is even studies to show that when someone is having an A, their bodies are actually producing hormones that are similar to being high.

anyways, keep praying, and have faith that God will restore your M.