Newbie (again)

[dday101798]

Thanks.

That darn roller coaster gets me everytime. But....

Hindsight 20/20, that was a very positive conversation last night I "won" a couple of small but in their own right big victories.

The conversation started with XW being uncertain still about moving and ended with she is staying and the boys stay in their schools, that is major and a huge relief. I could not bear the fact of them being so far away.

Secondly, the name thing, kind of shows to me a little bit of respect. She sounded upset she had to do it, again sighting me telling her to get it changed (quite a while ago, last October after our 10th anniversary and I was doing really bad). So I take that with a grain of salt on my part, but look at as a positive.

Lastly, and I can't believe I had the brass to ask when her and OM were getting married, and her response being rather quietly indicating that may not be happening at all. The whole time we were talking Xw made every attempt to do so in area away from OM, doing laundry and in the bathroom filling the tub (who fills a bathtub when the washing machine is running?).

So in a it's own way, that was a very good conversation and it just took me a little rest not to mention sobering up to soak in. I guess it was just the fact she sounded so upset that got to me. We did hit on a few touchy areas, but nothing nasty or fight like ensued, which is good, very good.

What really seemed to grab her attention is when I said I was greatful that she'd stay in the area as I was very concerned for the boys well being and hers for that matter should things not pan out with a new job or anything should she move and most likely I'll be doing the Navy and will not be here to bail her out if she gets into trouble.

Man, I'd love to say that the D is starting to peck away at her. It really seems that way.

I should mention this conversatin took place in two parts, the first was myself returning a call to S12 who left me a voice mail while I was mowing the lawn. When I called, XW answered and was making dinner from one my recipes that was kind of touching, and while I was talking to her, S12 was being very hostile with her in the background. After his meltdown on Satruday, he is obviously not very happy with all this. So, that kind of ate at me after hanging up an dstill not knowing what was going on with school. So I texted XW if we coul dtalk when she got done eating and she did.

My faulter to get back on that darn rollercoaster for a short duration is I'm just still too emotionally drawn to the situation and need to curb that. I did my best not to let on XW that fact, so I guess that's why I came here to let it out and crash, so there's another little victory.

Anyway, we came to the agreement to each enroll one of the kids on our own instead of all once and spliting the bill. But, I realized this morning, I can't do an enrollment as I'm no longer a resident, so we'll have to do it together.