Over the Shock and GALing 6

[Thinker]

I think it is odd as well. I don't think it is a question of what she want's, but more a question of what she doesn't want. She doesn't want me to have (more) fun time with the kids without her.

I am mind reading, but I believe it goes back to her fantasy that I would disappear (but keep providing money), leaving her life intact. The idea that if she were to D me then the kids would spend half of their time with me and that that would be a happy time for the kids (as it was last week when I spent the week at the beach with them) is painful and frightening to her.

I have seen this on a smaller scale before. Recently she gets upset and jealous any time I try to do something fun alone with the boys - especially the older 2. She is with them all day when I am working, and eagerly leaves them with me in the evenings if she wants to go to the gym or out to meet friends, but if I make plans to go do something fun with them without her (a movie, minigolf, etc), she get's angry.

It also ties into the point in every D discussion we have had where she get's angry and starts calling me a selfish unreasonable jerk - when I calmly state that I would accept nothing less than joint custody.