Soon to be separated

[GoBison]

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Well I guess that it is time to move over to separated. My wife is moving out tomorrow and I am even helping her in the move.

Brief summary: We will be married 6 years this Sunday. About two months ago my wife started to check out of our marriage. Everything had been going great up until that point. We had even decided to find jobs in a different state closer to our families so that we could have children. Then all of a sudden she started to become distant. She would rarely talk to me and when she did it was like she was doing me a favor by talking to me. I tried to see what was wrong and she would not tell me what was wrong. Finally she said that I am being jealous of her and that I am controlling. This was not really the case as I probably said 4 things to her in the last 5 months about some guy that she would talk to or text frequently or be on his FB. I know that nothing has happened between them and that there was nothing. And when I did say something to her it was pretty much why are you always talking to him and that was it.

So she was in a pissy mood for about a month. At first I thought ok so maybe she it is just her hormones as she came off the pill. But then I came back from a trip on 6/9/09 and the first thing she says to me is that she wants a D. I try to talk to her and all she will talk about is how to split things up. This went on for about three days when I could not take her talking about this and I left for a week to my sisters. After I moved back in she moved to the spare bedroom and has been there since that time. I try to DB acting as if and being generally happy. She continues to be extremely pissed off at me not talking pretty much at all and the few times that she is at home instead of out at all hours of the night she is in her bedroom with her computer and the door shut.

A week and a half ago she came to me and said that she was getting an apartment and would be moving out. I told her that I did not want her to and wished that we could go to C or something to work on our M. She wanted no of that and said that she was just too miserable here. I told her that she is the only one making herself miserable and that if she would just look around no one else is making her miserable. I told her that she has been coming home at all hours of the night and that I had not said a word to her and she was pretty much doing whatever she wanted. The next day she had a place and would be moving in soon.

She told me that she had gotten a short term 6 month lease which I found out that she had to pay extra for. Last week I tried to talk to her about not moving out but she just said that she was miserable and wanted out. So yesterday she began to pack things up. I asked her what all she was taking and all she would say is half of this and half of that. I just said ok I was just wondering. This morning I went to talk to her about paying the mortgage on the house and if she planned to pay a portion of it or what was going to happen. She said that she would and that she had told me we should just sell it. I asked her if this was it and if she was planning on coming back. She said that she thought that this was it. I asked if she had a L and if she planned to file anytime soon. She said that she did not have one but had thought about getting one but would not for a while. I asked her if I am just suppose to move on with my life and if that is what she wanted right now and she said no.

I know that she is really confused right now and really doesn't know what to do. I still believe that we can work this out and that she is still a good W even though the past two months have been hell. I just can't see throughing away 10 years together like this. After she is out I plan to go dark. As far as a L i have not talked to one yet but maybe in a couple of weeks I should probably do so just in case it does not work out. Right now I have to try and keep a positive attitude as I do one of the hardest things in my life and move my wife out of the house.