<< What's wrong with looking for someone that can "add" to your happiness after months and months of loneliness and rejection? And why a new person means "trouble" fb2? First let's set aside moral/religious convictions (I have mine, you have yours). Assume the spouse is a "gone case" (not your case). The D process when there are young kids, property, retirement, etc. (as far as I know it) is harrowing to say the least. The kids even at 50% time are a BIG responsibility, finances are low, mood is low, ... Where's the time and energy left to find/romance a woman unless the "right" person drops out of the sky and is all there for you? And remember after going thru' this thing once we need to be many times more careful the next time, right?
<< Sure things need to be "stable and normal" when you enter a new relationship and that is only to make sure you do justice to the other person involved and can give also and not only take, You also need to do justice to yourself. Most of the people on the "dating' scene are self-centered - they are looking for something for "me".
<< ...but I dont think life will wait for any of us and no one that I can recall here, expressed their intentions to become monk or stay celibate for ever. I for one rather be a celibate monk than do thru' this again!!! And life is not waiting for me, I'm living it to the full, one day at a time; call it DBing if you like but I think its my faith in God.
<< If the people here are not able to have a relationship after a divorce or a R failing, then...DBing is crap. We should be able to have BETTER and "easier", more fullfilling relationships, not give up and hide in our caves. I sense your frustration and maybe DBing is cr*p after all!? But no need to hide in your cave. Look up the Dalai Lama - he's all over the globe and he's a monk.
<< In everything there must be balance and limit. Including loneliness. I for one, am fed up with this whole "stay alone, celibate and miserable until ..." when exactly, by the way? If anyone feels like going ahead and dating , I say go ahead and date. Kids dont have to know until is time for them to know. The modern, self-centered culture eh? This is want got us where we are. Why do you have to be lonely and imbalanced unless you have an 'R' as you call it? Life has so many dimensions. You are making and selling jewelry, I am taking care of my kids and renovating my home and meeting with sincere friends and family. Why do I need to be "miserable" and why do I need someone else in the picture to be "whole" again?
<< Come on people, we are not dead or sick or with low morals when we crave for someone to love and to be loved by. We are just humans and need affection. Enough with this honorable BS that hide fear and shuttered hearts. Let's call it what it is. We are just animals, right?
<< They [kids] need to see us creating happy lives again, especially after a huge blow as a painful divorce. If I was in my kids shoes I certainly wouldn't be happy with a "step-mother" or "step-father". But I really don't know what goes on their little minds. However, it is possible to find happiness without selfishly putting the kids thru' yet more emotional pain.
P.S. I looked in the netherworld for pictures of your jewelry but did not spot any. Hope you are doing well.
