Unstoppable

[dday101798]

Hi NoCode,

I know you feel the exposure is wrong an dthis person should have no involvmemt in your children's lives at this time. Trust me, my XW up and moved in with OM, just like that, no 'break in period', nothing. My boys went from a family of their mother, father and them, to the craziness it all is today. And If you'd like, go ahead and search up my threads, I, like you was infuriated by that.

But where did that get me? Nowhere.

I was determined to fight tooth and nail for those kids for the betterment of a family enviornment. Where did that get me? Nowhere.

It was a hard, hard choice to make, but seing the pain in my kids eyes due to the constant bickering and fighting over them, and the fact as you may know, it gets ugly in that courtroom and my XW was determined to deplore me as person and I almost lost all right to my kids, I just did exactly as you are pondering. I folded, I gave in to what she felt was the right thing for everyone.

Since, my kids have thanked me whole heartedly for not subjecting them to anymore. My kids know this is not what I wanted, but they know I as their father made a huge sacrafice for their well-being. And mostly, my kids know that should they ever not be comfortable with XW and OM should they marry as they proclaim to be, the custody agreement is no different than any other piece of paper and CAN be changed.

Also, in respects to XW, now that I gave her what she "wanted", guess what? She's realizing more and more everyday and thus has said, this isn't what she wanted. And we were hard fought through and through just as you.

I am not telling you what to do, merely stating I was exactly in the same position not too long ago myself and hopefuly providing you some insight to the question you posed. For me, letting it go allowed me to truly start to heal, it gave my kids peace, and although this is a new development, allows my XW and I a re-newed chance at being friends with each other, and who knows?

For me, continuing the fight was more unhealthy for EVERYONE versus my kids exposure to OM. It also nearly destroyed me in every sense, I am now left nothing, no house, and only 5 boxes of my possesions and a ton of attorney's fees. And, as with any other instant relationship, it won't last long. Chin up.

As far as legal action to bar OM from the kids, complete waste of time and money. You can, as I did have it worded that no one of the oposite sex stay overnight aside from a fiance or spouse. In my case taht is there with the intent that OM bolts, I can then limit who is around them afterward. It's a goofy system.