I think those are all fine. Only get into it if HE does, tho. You might want to add, re: his involving your son, that you both have to be careful not to try and use your son as a "counselor" -- that's not his job, and "we should be helping HIM cope with the family's changes, not the other way around."
I also think you should proactively say something to him about communicating with your son. In his foggy state, he may not even realize how long it's been (us DAMs can be that way sometimes even when we're NOT foggy). A simple "Do you realize it's been 'x' number of days since you called (son)? I know we're both busy, but he really needs to hear from you more often." -- or some such.
