alex, all i can say is wow. detach completely from your W right now if you haven't all the way and be there for your kids. console them, they need you more then you could imagine.
be very careful what you say to them, just talk to them about you and your R with them and how that will not change. don't stick up for your W, i have a feeling you won't have a problem with that, but don't attack her either. it's you and them.
you need to take the kids and go do something with them tomorrow. sit them down and let them know that the four of you are still a family and need to stick together through this. Let them know it's ok not to support their mom in what she is doing. they have every right to express how they feel fit to her about what they are feeling about what she is doing.
your W likely isn't going to wake up anytime soon, but this is all fresh in the kid's mind and them speaking to her each individually might make a dent in her thoughts about how this isn't affecting them. maybe not right away, but it will at some point.
i'm so sorry man, i literally cried for you and your kids when i read your story. my prayers and thoughts are with you tonite.
