At this point, I would stop worrying about making him mad. You don't have a lot of time to pussyfoot around with the various DB tactics, so put the brakes on.
He is trying to railroad you into signing away your rights, he is insulting you, rejecting you at every turn except sex, and you are playing right into it.
Put your foot down and tell him you are not comfortable with rushing into a D. Repeat this to him like a mantra. And I am not kidding. Each time he starts in on it, hold up your hand and say, "Please stop. I have made up my mind to get my own legal counsel."
What is with the big rush anyway? Doesn't that make you wonder? Slow down! Once he is out of the country, you will be S.O.L. and very sorry that you didn't stand up for yourself.
A 20 year marriage is not something you dissolve by signing some ridiculous paper drawn up by a self-serving jerk with his concern about "wasting money."
Get an atty fast and skip Denver. Who knows what he will pull while you are gone? Protect yourself. You have been shown what he is capable of, and this is just the tip of the iceberg.
