You are very insightful. Ultimately it is a matter of perspective. It used to be that I was the voice of reason, the rock, the one who balanced H out. Now that he is moving on, I was holding him back and he was faking it...no matter.
If my step-dad who has been with my mom for over 30 years, left her for another woman, he would say he couldn't be himself with her, she held him back etc. But, if they grow old together (which they are and I suspect will continue to), he will regard her as his strength, his better half, his partner who was different and wonderful.
We twist and turn these things in the ways that suit us and make it more comprehensible. There is no verifiable truth. Today this separation is the worst calamity, in ten years I'll probably say it was the best thing that could have happened (although, hopefully I'll be wise enough to know that it just was what it was)...
