You, too, hit the nail on the head. I often think my W reads books about making D a good experience and moving on to convince herself that what she is doing is right. It isn't.
And, just like you, my M has its issues, ALL of which can be conquered. Even in the totality, they do not add up to D. But, the WAS does not see it that way - only their perception matters.
Which is why I think we have to focus on what we can control - us. But, it is frustrating, especially times like now, when W and I seem to be getting along like before any problems, ANY problems. Would be tempting to bring up R, but that is one rule I am not going to violate.
