Remember also... The Joy of the Lord is your strength.
I love that David Cook song!
Right now though, I'm not feeling so warm towards H. We are still living in the same house, dif bdrms, and going through D for last six months. He is an MLCer and knows the script well. For the last year, when this all started, I had decided to stand for my marriage. I have grown really close in my relationship with GOD through this, which is the best thing that has happened. Without the strength I've gained through HIM,and good understanding Christian friends, I may have been in major depression long ago. H has OW, and it has been so hard watching him come and go while living under the same roof. At my lowest times, outside of reading my Bible, I go to the Rejoice Marriage Ministries website. That website has given me so much comfort, especially when I read about the restored marriages.
I am on my second week of a three week vacation. It has been so good for me to be away from the madness for awhile. I do feel animosity setting in though, which I don't feel when I'm at home. I start thinking about how much he must be loving that I'm not there. He can come and go with OW freely. I start wondering if she's been in my house. (sigh). He texted me twice the day I left. I answered the first one, but not the second. I made up my mind to have NC. I was hoping he would miss me, but why should he if he has OW. (sigh again).
I do love him, but not who he has turned into. I pray for him all the time. I also pray for OW, that someone would come into her life that is available and not already married. That is hard. I also wonder if this prodigal were to come home, if I could forget. I need to forgive, I know that.
We need to remember the power of prayer, and HIS timing. The patience is what's getting to me though. And him acting like a teenager! lol
