WAW - Very confused and devastated - pt 11

[confusedinpa]

Overall a very nice day with the boys. Fantastic weather so we spent most of the day outside.

I got a little sad again when I was eating dinner with the boys. Not exactly sure why. I think it's because dinner time in the past was when the 4 of us were together. It's very odd as it has been the 3 of us (or just me) for dinner for several weeks now, but it still hurts. I know I need to let go/detach/drop the rope. Some days are better than others though.

Both my boys got worn out by 7 PM (usually they aren't even worn out when it's their bed time at 8:30 PM).

My wife didn't call to say good nite to the boys, nor did the boys ask to call her. It's odd even as she called me several times today, she never asked to speak to the boys. I know she says that she misses them, but don't understand why she doesn't call to talk to them or at least say goodnite.

I'm also still thinking about what she said about our relationship lacking a connection. She seems to be under the impression that connections just happen and are either there or not there. I know we were connected at one point and she feels it faded as we got stuck in our rut.

My cousin (she's in her early 30's as well) tried to explain it to me where a connection's worst enemy is boredon. She's had several relationships that ended because she never communicated what she needed/wanted. She has learned now and has been in a long term serious relationship for 6+ years. Guess this is a lesson that my wife and I has learned. She didn't communicate her needs to the point that I understood and I didn't take the time to understand what she needed.

So guess that leads to my question, how do you establish a connection with a WAW? She has said that she's given up finding a reason to try again. So what's the next step......