I know you want answers and more than a 'sorry'. Knowing 'why' it happened in the first place and what went so 'wrong' for your BF that he looked elsewhere for a while, is natural. I know for me it helped so much because it made me feel I could ensure those 'triggers' didn't happen again. If you can approach it with him that way and explain it like that maybe he will open up more.
I mentioned this to you before......it took a whole year before out of the blue I got what felt like a proper 'sorry......what the bloody hell was I thinking of.....I don't know what happened to me' statement.
I also know that resentment would come to the surface in me every now and then and I would want to twist the knife to make my H feel guilty. It's all about how the power/ balance in the R changes. For so long it felt like he had the power over it and now it was in a state of flux. I imagine at some point you will feel that you are the one with the power and then gradually it resolves itself.
As I am sure you are aware, it's not uncommon for the LBS to think at this stage about actually throwing in the towel.....they have won back the prize and now they can show them they aren't worth having. It doesn't sound at all like you feel like that, but it isn't uncommon to feel.
Ali, you need to see that things are moving rapidly for you compared to most on the piecing board. I was lucky and they did for me to BUT it also still took a whole year for a REAL HEARTFELT '[censored] , what did I do?' from my H.
Congrats on the job and the way you are handling things. MIL's are always tricky things.....I just keep the hell away from mine!!!!!
Saffie me 46 H 46 M in 1986 D20,D18,S16,D13 H's A 01/05 to 07/06 H recommitted to M 07/06 renewed vows 09/06 Going from strength to strength
