well, W called twice today at noon. left a mssg the 2nd time asking me to call her back, said she doesn't know what is going on but she is starting to get scared.
have no idea what that means but whatever.
just txtd her back 4 hours later saying, "Hey u, stop worryin i'm fine. sorry i don't have time to call, i just got back in and have 2 get ready 2 go out to dinner b4 work. Plz shred my debit card u found."
i immediately shut my phone off after i hit send.
puppy, you were so right about it being SIMPLE what i need to do, but it is SO NOT EASY. it feels wrong in so many ways, but i know what i was doing wasn't working before. it kept ME stuck in limbo and kept ME dangling on her string.
after having such a great time last nite, i miss my old life even less. and having completely read ALL of PearlH's threads, i have a better understanding of how this stuff SHOULD work. her story should be required reading for every new person on this board. i'm not saying she did it perfectly, but after reading her whole sitch for 4 days straight, i came away with a better understanding of how this all can work.
my gal efforts this week have been really beneficial to my state of mind. i don't feel helpless in this sitch or in my life anymore. also, i'm starting to write out a list of what i want my future R's to be. they are my wants, desires, and boundaries of what is acceptable or not. whether she ever decides to come back or not, i know all my future R's will be far more healthier then anyone's i've had in the past.
thank you to everyone on this board. you really do help and get through to some people. i believe i am one of them.
