D1 was doing okay this morning. She had her hair done up like Shrek which was cute. She seemed a bit whiny, wanting to cuddle with a blanket while I held her. She just leaned against me and sighed. She dropped the blanket at one point and another child picked it up and she started throwing a fit. I picked it up for her and she was fine again.
W was sitting in a chair down the hallway, but she didn't acknowledge me.
I feel somewhat sad today... that "caretaker" part of me wants to reach out to W and plead with her to stop throwing her life away... and after everything she has wanted to throw out against me it would be ridiculous to even entertain the possibility of our marriage surviving. Why do I even let those thoughts through my head after all of this has transpired?
I go back to my priority list...
1. D1 2. W getting help or not 3. My M
It would be foolish to consider any sort of relationship now. I've gotten the general "fogged" responses where she "never" loved me, didn't like me since she first met me, etc. BPD or not, I'm sure things will settle in her mind at some point and she will miss what we had.
Why do I even care though?
Trial: 10:23:18:30
"You can't reason someone out of a position they didn't reason themselves into."
