Sandi - one other thing you could probably provide interesting feedback on is that I have a strong suspicion that my wife is dead set on D for another reason, due to the fact that she has a lot of trouble facing her own wrongdoing or ever admitting fault. FAcing the fact that she had/has the EA is very painful for her and she feels very guilty.

I feel like since she had the EA and was exposed, she feels like D is inevitable because R would mean that the M wasn't bad enough for her to have the EA. She wants to prove the justification for the EA was the bad M to absolve herself of blame, and getting a D would go a long way towards proving it.

It is almost like R would mean admitting she was wrong so she will run from that possibility too.

Sound crazy?

ME/XW:47
S21, D19, S15, S14
M:21 T:26
W moved 6/10 I filed 7/10 D final 4/12 remarried 8/12
W wants to R 12/10 and 4/11 but I decline