WAW - Very confused and devastated - pt 10

[confusedinpa]

The dinner we had tonite went as well as it can be. The kids got in a little bit of trouble as they made a mess out of themselves playing around.

I was in a very upbeat positive mood as, even though it's a good news/bad news scenario, I was glad to get a job offer.

I was very positive but had noticed that something was bothering my wife. Wasn't quite sure of what it was but then she opened up at the end of dinner. She had been reading more of the Science of Success book last nite and it had gotten her down. And her friend's brother's funeral was today. So it was just a downer of a day.

She called me later after I got home with the boys. She told me some tactical stuff, but then started asking abut how the job thing went. Unfortunately, the 3 year old needed some help so I told her that I would try and talk to her later after the boys went to bed.

I called her after they went to bed and she started complaining about her mom then she said how she and her sister had a conversation the other nite talking about her sister's divorce (6 years ago).

Then it turned into a relationship talk that lasted about an hour. She started going on about the "connection" that a husband and wife should have that we don't. I went down the route of the connection doesn't just happen, it needs to be worked on.

She tried the history of hurt route but I stopped her with the I appologized for that already and have learned from it.

Then she went into how she's too afraid to be vulnerable at the risk of getting hurt again to try and create the connection.

So it goes full circle again on the relationship conversation.

This time, I told her that that's something that she needs to work on and think about for herself. As that's a choice that she is making. Right now she feels that way, but feelings do change.

So it was getting late, but I ended the call.

Not a good conversation.

So, how should I respond to "afraid to be vulnerable at the risk of getting hurt again?"

ARGHHHHHHH!!!

This is crappy....